Every Medical Show, Episode Twelve: The Night Shift

In which the hospital staff play a dangerous game.

The clock strikes midnight at Average City Hospital. The doctors and nurses unlucky enough to be assigned the night shift are bored and rather sleepy, but they know that dawn is a long way away. The hospital ward is empty and quiet, the patients are all asleep and there’s nothing to do. What better way to pass the time than playing a little game of Truth or Dare….

Gossipy Nurse: Hey, wanna know a secret? *Leans against the counter of the nurses’ station.*

Apathetic Nurse: Not really. Can’t you see I’m busy? *She goes back to flipping through a magazine.*

Cute Quirky Intern: I wanna know the secret!

Gossipy Nurse: This is nurse talk kid. Move along. Go diagnose something. *Waves his hand towards the patients’ rooms behind him.*

Apathetic Nurse: Actually……you should stay here Cute Quirky Intern. We’re….going to play a game. *Shares a conspiratorial look with Gossipy Nurse.*

Gossipy Nurse: Yea….*gives an evil smile.* In fact, I’ll call everyone on the floor to play. *Texting furiously on his phone.* Okay, I’m texting everyone.

It's game time. Get ready to play! Nurses' station right now.

Cute Quirky Intern: Yeah! I love games! *Removes her glasses and wipes them clean on her scrubs.*

Apathetic Nurse: Of course you do.

*Two minutes later, Panicked Intern, Dr. Handsome Face, and Nurse Sexy Hair show up at the nurses’ station.*

Panicked Intern: I hope this game is worth it. I was actually dozing off two minutes ago.

Cute Quirky Intern: Games are always worth it! I’m so excited. What’re we playing?

Gossipy Nurse: Truth or dare.

Dr. Handsome Face: Kind of a juvenile game don’t you think?

Nurse Sexy Hair: I really liked playing it in high school. Spinning the bottle was my favorite part. *Smiles at Dr. Handsome Face.*

Apathetic Nurse: We’re playing truth or dare, not spin the bottle.

Nurse Sexy Hair: Aren’t they the same thing? *Twirls her hair.*

Gossipy Nurse: Doesn’t matter. Dr. Handsome Face, you’re up. Truth or dare?

Dr. Handsome Face: Uh. Truth, I guess.

Panicked Intern: Tell us who your favorite intern is. 

*Mumbling.* Please let it be me.

Dr. Handsome Face: Overachiever Intern.

Panicked Intern: What!

Dr. Handsome Face: *Shrugs.* She found my patient chart.

Panicked Intern: I can’t believe this….I tried so hard. For nothing. Nothing I do matters. *Hyperventilating.* I need my medication---

Cute Quirky Intern: Your turn Panicked Intern.

Panicked Intern: Why? I can hardly breathe. *Holding his chest and breathing heavily.* Okay, fine. Dare.

Gossipy Nurse: Well this next dare will leave you breathless. *Laughs at own joke. He looks between Panicked Intern and Apathetic Nurse.* I dare you to kiss Apathetic Nurse. On the lips.

*Panicked Intern hyperventilates even more.*

Apathetic Nurse: No. Absolutely not.

Cute Quirky Intern: But it’s the rules Apathetic Nurse. He has to do the dare.

Panicked Intern: Okay. I’ll do it. I---I---I can do this. *He tries to calm his breathing down.* But not in front of everyone.

Gossipy Nurse: Fine. Just go in the closet there.

Nurse Sexy Hair: Ooo, so we’re playing seven minutes in heaven? *Flips her hair.* I better put on some chapstick. *Looks at Dr. Handsome Face.*

*Panicked Intern goes into the closet and Apathetic Nurse grudgingly follows him.*

Panicked Intern: Uh, okay. I’m ready. *Puckers up his lips.*

Apathetic Nurse: Aren’t you supposed to kiss me?

Panicked Intern: Right. Um. Okay. *Keeps staring at Apathetic Nurse.*

Apathetic Nurse: Hurry up. I’m getting old here.

Panicked Intern: I can’t. Not like this. *Knocks over a stack of toilet paper rolls.*

Apathetic Nurse: Gahhh! You drive me crazy kid, you act all in love with me, following me around everywhere, and when you get a chance to kiss me, you won’t even---

*Panicked Intern cuts her off with a kiss. Apathetic Nurse kisses him back. They make out.*

Panicked Intern: Well….?

Apathetic Nurse: If you tell anyone we made out, I’ll burn your house down.

Panicked Intern: Okay. *Smiles.* I can keep a secret. Anything you want my beautiful angel.

Apathetic Nurse: Don’t call me that. *She opens the closet door and her and Panicked Intern rejoin the group.*

Gossipy Nurse: How was the kiss? *Looks really excited.*

Apathetic Nurse: It was adequate.

*Panicked Intern looks deflated.*

Cute Quirky Intern: It’s my turn now! *Jumps up and down and claps her hands.* I pick dare!

Gossipy Nurse: Tone it down kid, you don’t what the dare is.

Apathetic Nurse: You know the third floor hallway? The wing near room 313? *Glances at Gossipy Nurse and lifts her eyebrows.*

Nurse Sexy Hair: Oooo, that’s the haunted hallway. *Giggles.*

Stay away from room 313.....

Cute Quirky Intern: *Sounding scared.* It’s haunted?

Dr. Handsome Face: It’s not haunted. That’s just a ridiculous hospital legend.

Panicked Intern: A true legend! I saw the ghost once. I peed on myself.

*Everyone stares at Panicked Intern. Panicked Intern’s face gets red and he hides under the counter.*

Gossipy Nurse: Well then it’s settled. We dare you to walk the haunted hallway.

Nurse Sexy Hair: Bring something back to prove it. Bring the doorplate with room 313 on it.

Cute Quirky Intern: Uhh….okay. I’ll, I’ll do it. *Trying to look brave.* I’m not scared of ghosts.

Apathetic Nurse: Evil British Doctor hangs out around there. He likes the privacy for his “experiments.”

Cute Quirky Intern: The vampire doctor?

Dr. Handsome Face: He’s not a vampire. He’s just….different.

Panicked Intern: *Speaking from underneath the counter.* He always works the night shift. He likes killing patients. He hates garlic.

Nurse Sexy Hair: And he never shows up in the staff picture.

Dr. Handsome Face: He doesn't even go to the staff pictures. He doesn't like cameras.

Apathetic Nurse: I wonder why that is.

Gossipy Nurse: Okay, stop stalling for her guys, go to the haunted hallway!

*He pushes Cute Quirky Intern towards the elevator.*

Everyone: *Chanting.* Go! Go! Go! Go!

*The elevator dings and the door opens. Cute Quirky Intern steps inside and pushes the button for the third floor.*

Cute Quirky Intern: See you on the other side. *Waves goodbye to everyone.*

Will Cute Quirky Intern survive her trip through the haunted hallway? Is there really a ghost there? And how long will the hospital staff play truth or dare? Is there no limit to the madness? Tune in next week to find out what happens on, Every Medical Show…..